Rockets Red Glare

History mocks itself, and that's a good thing. It means that problems are in the rear view mirror.

This week we celebrated Independence Day. Fireworks exploded in the sky to oohs and ahhs across America. Meanwhile, my son Isaiah is in Israel. He and his friends took refuge in a bomb shelter the other night, bracing for incoming missiles. That's when I suddenly realized what our fireworks are about. The colorful explosions that we've come to adore? They are simulations of the rocket's red glare, the bombs bursting in air, as famously observed one night by a terrified poet named Francis Scott Key. Key's jubilance at surviving that battle, and upon the cessation of fire in 1812, became our national anthem. Sure, he'd be aghast if he knew that we celebrate that evening's carnage with ever-growing whimsy. But, you know what? If he was cool, he'd laugh a little too. We're free to make fun of the past because, two hundred years later, we live in safety still.

Plus, it's not really the bombs that we toast. It is the cessation of war. It is freedom and safety.

I pray that someday, Jews and Palestinians can enjoy such freedom and safety and that they too can mock conflict and hoist a glass to the absurd. If they do so with fireworks, it will be especially ironic because maybe in 1812, wars were won with bombs but in today's Middle East, bombs will never be the means to an end of conflict. Peace requires putting the weapons down and for all parties to deploy empathy, reason, compassion, respect, dialogue, justice, understanding and leadership. 

My eldest is in Jerusalem tonight. Meanwhile, one of my other child's best friends is in East Jerusalem. He is a Palestinian.

I look forward to both of our boys returning home to Brooklyn, and to a day when friends and brothers, Jews and Arabs, Israelis and Palestinians can toast each other's freedom. They should celebrate as inappropriately as they'd like to, mocking history from a distance, the problems of today happily, safely, in the rear view mirror.

Isaiah's youth group at the Western Wall, in Jerusalam

The Low Point of My Career?

I got this email last night asking re: my availability for a job. The nature of the request amazed me. Here's what she wrote, and what I wrote in response. How would you have responded?

Good Day Eddie,

I am the Production Manager for Season 3 of "The Real Untold XXXXX” and I got your name from XXXXX. We are filming 3 interviews on Monday March 17 in the New York Area and are looking for a shooter that does the whole shoot...ie. lighting, sound(wireless) recorded to camera, shooting, and supply & setup/operate laptop/Skype.

Based on that we are looking for an all-in price of $1000 for shooter, and all camera/lighting/sound equipment, including laptop with built-in webcam/Skype loaded, and black Duvatyne backdrop. The day is scheduled from 7:30am - 5:00pm from setup to tear down plus dropping the footage off to FedEx for overnight shipping. If you are available and interested would you please provide me with a link to some of your work that would be similar to the type of set up we are doing? I have checked out your website but we would really like to see a clip or shot that you have done with a backdrop and this style of lighting.

Below is a screen shot of the look we are asking for.

Since we do not have a field producer or director on site we rely on the DP to create the look and so I have also included the specification sheet for your review.

For your consideration, here are some additional details about what we are expecting you to provide for the the shoot: 

• Camera gear, tripod & tape stock/disc 

• Appropriate Lighting gear (as required to match example image & Interview Lighting Specs, as provided) -- for this interview it will be magenta gel, double sheets for the Background Spot Light for main subjects and diffusion for less important ones. 

• wrinkle free black Duvatyne backdrop & stand, large enough to have approx.. 10ft wide backdrop • Sound equipment, including lav (mic not to be seen on-camera) & ability to monitor sound 

• Laptop with webcam, and Skype loaded and tested, plus long ethernet cable to hardwire to internet for smooth video feed for interview. 

• Blackout material, if needed for windows, doors, etc.--- we will try to get a room without windows 

• HD Color monitor to allow for matching to sample image (color and shape of spot light, etc) • Apple boxes, stand, etc. to allow for laptop to be propped up to appropriate height beside camera to match camera lens height 

• Powder for face shine 

• Camera phone or other camera to allow for photo of set-up/look to be sent to Showrunner prior to taping interview 

• The shooter/PA would also need to FedEx us the original media/tapes right after the shoot (OVERNIGHT PRIORITY) ...we will provide the account to charge that to on the call sheet. 

• it is an interview talking head style shoot for HD broadcast--- see attached for lighting specs & sample images. 

• we run the interview remotely via Skype video on a laptop (ie. Producer here in Canada, interviewing the subject on Skype video in your remote location). The laptop gets setup right beside the camera lens(same side as Key light) to get good eye line— WE WOULD NEED YOU TO SUPPLY THE LAPTOP WITH WEBCAM & SKYPE & ETHERNET CABLE TO HARDWIRE TO THE INTERNET

I look forward to hearing from you about your availability and discussing the possibility of you participating in the production. If you do not shoot in this area I would be grateful if you would put me in touch with someone from the area.

Kind Regards, Laura XXXXX 

Production Manager

 XXXX Pictures 

My response...

Dear Laura,

Thanks so much for the inquiry. I wish I could help, but I'm sadly not available that day. One tiny confession - I'm not really a Director/DP/Gaffer/Soundman/Producer/Grip/MakeupArtist/ Rentalhouse/Technologist/PA/AC/Driver. I do know plenty of people who are though. We've been getting our 'slash/hybrids' from a laboratory in Texas (part of the UT Bio/Film School) that clones excellent reality TV technicians. I'll forward you a list of some recently released models for you to choose from asap.

However, before you spend the astronomical sum of $1000 to produce three key interviews for your excellent show, may I suggest something? I bet it would be more cost effective to locate interviewees who can operate camera, sound and produce their OWN shoots. That way, you wouldn't need to even spend money on gas to get the factotum to the shoot - eliminating the rest of those pesky, remaining line items.

You may also consider directing viewers to simply watch re-runs of previous shows. That way, your company wouldn't have to spend anything at all. In reality (no pun intended!) who would know? I'm sure the dissimilarities from one episode of "The Real Untold XXXXX" to the next are miniscule. Ok, yes, then the stories could not technically still be called "Untold"... But if you substitute the words "America's Most..." into the title of a reality show, anything goes.

Rebranding previous episodes rather than shooting new ones might not only save money, but may also make your show even more redeeming by preventing abusive programming from being added to the scrapheap of the cable dial. This would even save a few precious kilowatts of energy, slowing global warming.

Think of the headlines and excellent PR your show could get from that? You could open with a title card that says, "No baby penguins were harmed through the making of this bullshit."

Thanks again reaching out. If you need anything else for free, just let me know!

Best, 

Eddie